Tuesday, January 31, 2006
Chinese New Year Ordeals

*fuck blogger, the bloody page crashed without saving and i had to type this whole entry again!!



Wanted #1 - FATs Donor
"boy ah u nv eat ah y u seem to be thinner liao?"
"u will look more handsome if u eat fatter leh"
"aiyoo ah boy ah, li bo jak sibo? an zhua ah ni san?"
"ai jiak ho liao ka eh pui, pui liao ka yandao mah"
"aiyo boy ah y u still this size every year?!"
.....etc etc etc!!


Wanted #2 - Girlfriend
"hey happy new year, where is your gf?"
"when u bringing your gf to meet us?"
"u don't have a gf meh?"
"don't bluff leh how can u don't have a gf?!"
"boy ah li eh chabor peng yiu leh? bo lai meh?"
"hey boy when ya getting married and have a nice baby girl like mine?"
.....etc etc etc!!

Etc means there are still lots more of such similiar questions or comments! my god!

Oh well i don't know whether to fume of laugh, i feel irriated at times but yet funny as well! What a way to begin the new year for me, fancy my family and relatives to be asking these questions! I do know i need to gain weight and i do know i will look very nice if i gain afew pounds but saying is easier than doing! Nevertheless i'm going to make this a MUST, remembering the post about 'Its a MUST'.

As for the bloody girlfriend thing its really getting on my nerves. Can someone tell me which part of me tells people that i'm supposely attached?! Not only relatives but even friends often assume i'm attached all the time! Damn damn damn i must make this clear : I'm fucking single and available but having a girlfriend is NOT the top of my priority list right now!

New year often throws up some awkward siutations and one of the most memorable one was me sitting in a tiny living room with 3 lovely drovey couples while waiting for my turn to eat!! I wished the ground would simply open up and swallow me at that moment!

Keeping in mind that my gambling luck is very poor this year, i totally stayed away from gambling. But i'm still thinking if i would be able to resist a big temptation this coming June in the form of the World Cup!

Ang bao 'harvest' is really bad as well this year, so i'd be praying more of my relatives and friends get married soon so that i can go and take ang bao for them next year!

These 2 days have also make me realized what a long way everyone's came. In fact every year i look at my cousins i would have this thinking. For Christ's sake i wasn't even aware that one of my cousin is already in JC, maybe because i've always this assumption that all my cousins are little kids in secondary school or primary school to me. But seeing everyone this year make me realized that all of us have grown up, long gone are those days where we were excited little kids during chinese new year and behaving like monkeys, running about and even playing void deck 'catching' or better known as 'police and thief' and other games as well. These days, everyone would just gather, exchange greetings and handshakes and sit down there quietly.

The younger ones will still make alot of noises but the older ones like myself would just sit there and interact normally with our relatives. I still miss those good old days during chinese new year when i was a kid though, the days where my cousins and me would run around like little monkeys and play so much that we refuse to go home!

Watching young kids playing joyfully without a single worry in this world really puts a smile to my face.

Anyway last night after visiting my aunt's place i headed down to MOS for the sho'down party with sze wei and grace and summer joined us with her friends later on. For the first time ever i din't had to queue at all to get into MOS. Now i hate to say this but the feeling is FUCKING SHIOK! Especially when i look at the usual long and messy queue, i feel so relieved and yet shiok! Thank you priority enterance pass!

The crowd was very lively and the music equally good as well. Singapore finally has a club to be proud of!

Happy new year once again guys!
posted by mango at 5:18 PM 0 Bitchings
Sunday, January 29, 2006
Happy Lunar New Year!!


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my living room during cny eve....so 'un-red'!!

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wine and alcohol corner (there's still more in the storeroom!)
posted by mango at 7:04 AM 0 Bitchings
Saturday, January 28, 2006
Lunar New Year Eve

This is gonna be a long post, in terms of pictures at least. First and foremost almost the whole class minus 2 went to celebrate our big lady boss Kylie's birthday in advance at Marche and Chinablack.

Pior to that while on the train there i saw 2 extremely disgusting god-knows-what indian girls. I had to notice them as they were sitting directly in the seats in front of me. What i did notice at 1st was one of them looking extremely awful and disgusting. Pardon my bluntness and mean-ness, but i don't see the need to be conservative with what i say here because i've never seen a girl so fat (not obese la ok!) and yet wear untill so disguting. She was wearing those ultra short mini skirt with black gothic style stockings and carrying those 'coffin' style handbags and her hair was in a total mess, resembling those cropse brides. Worst still she was sitting like nobody's watching her and from where i was sitting she resembles a horrible african monster that could devour anyone anytime!

The other one wasn't that bad but looking at her face i couldn't make out if it was a guy or a girl. Those thick eye brows that makes me sick in the stomach, the extremely messy hair that seem to have cobwebs in them and the hairy arms confounded matters. But i later make out that they were lesbians, the worst and most disgusting lesbians i've ever seen in my life.

How on the earth would a couple smooch and touch in the public? It wasn't some normal touchy feely stuffs, it was intimating stuffs and really makes me wanna puke straight away. I swear everyone in that cabin got sick in the stomach at the sight of 1 'big black monster' touching and french-kissing a 'duno-is-guy-or-girl' monster. Just by looking at the faces of fellow passengers on the train i already knew the answer. At one point, the big fat black shit tried to put her camera phone into her partner's blouse apparently to snap a picture. Now what do u call this? Please tell me if u know the answer, i'm still searching high and low for one. Enough said, i got so sick that i nearly lost all my apetitte for marche.

We had the longest and biggest table at Marche and made even noisier sound and noises. All sorts of monkey noises and laughters could be heard from our table and i think there were afew unhappy souls out there who had their quiet dinner ruined totally. Can't blame us, what do u expect when there were like nearly 20 insane people out there on a big table?

We headed for Chinablack afterwards and how i noticed the times have changed, One year ago, the mention of Chinablack would send excitement down me but now? I felt nothing, i felt bored instead. Things changed really fast!

Anyway the music was at times really horrible but surprisinly they still managed to pack the whole dance floor at times. Not bad but we created our own form of fun, not as fun as it could have been but at least nobody got drunk after 10 jugs, 12 glasses and over 20 shots of tequilla! Thats a miracle!

We took over 300 pictures covering everyone but i will only display afew of them. Too lazy to resize and edit so many pictures lah!


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Me and Kylie

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The guys and our big lady boss for the day

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The entire bunch of us @ Marche

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These 2 are better off at the circus!

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ops!

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calm....

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...before the storm!

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we all hate owen!! fuck fuck fuck him!!

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not bad, she finally knows how to drink....barely!

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Me Jason n Chris (fiona's fingers r fucking extra)


I got a really big shock when i checked the news after i got home. Robbie Fowler re-signs for Liverpool in a free transfer that shocked everyone as well! WoooT! Excellent news and i totally forgot how sleepy i was. Instead of going straight to bed i ended up checking and reading every piece of news about him.

You can't blame me, i grew up supporting Liverpool and Robbie was my idol. I vividly remember my first ever class jersey in secondary one was printed the number 23 as Fowler was wearing 23 at that time in 1996.

This post is dedicated to the man known as GOD to liverpool fans.

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PFA young player of the year 1995

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showdown with Roy Keane in 1996 FA Cup final

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The Legend

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trademark header

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my first liverpool jersey with fowler's name and number


Alright finally its Chinese New Year Eve and that means having the 20th reunion dinner of my life. It should be 23rd but i only had my first dinner at the age of 3 according to my parents, so that makes it 19! My family's reunion dinner is nothing special but special in our own rights. Its a simple and low key affair although the food and stuffs are great! I've been complaining to my mom for almost 15 years that she should cook like that everyday haha! I miss eating dinner with the entire family that means my uncles and aunties but that is not possible now that everyone of them is married with their own family, so only one uncle and one auntie would come over to my place to have dinner together.

After the dinner there were quite alot of leftovers and my uncle said: "when u were all kids, everyone always fights for the biggest chicken drumstick but now that all of u are old nobody even wants the drumstick anymore". Woot, how true it is!

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my humble reunion dinner for 7 of us

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a clearer view, there's stilll 2 dishes missing though....

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my fav, roasted duck!
posted by mango at 9:11 PM 0 Bitchings
Friday, January 27, 2006
New Layout

This is a long overdue piece of work as it took my lazy ass nearly 1 month to get into the mood to revamp my skin/layout. Started editing the whole layout as early as 10am this morning and completed it at 3.30pm. Shortest ever time i took to edit my layout compared to the previous times.

Oh well, another dark layout and its not that i din't considered a lighter contrast but black or dark colors seem to be my preference. Anyway the 'about me' section is still under construction i'm pretty sure i'd be a very lame and yet insteresting one when its eventually up, so do forgive me for the delay!

Today is our 'big lady boss' kylie's birthday, i call her big lady boss because she demands everyone to dress up for her party later on damn! For sure there would be lotsa fun and pictures coming on the way later.

Anyway pls do give me your comments on the new layout peeps!
posted by mango at 3:35 PM 0 Bitchings
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
It's a MUST!

There's this famous quote from a brazilian footballer 'Sorcates' which i remember vividly - no man will change for the better until he sees the need for it

I've always had this firm presumption on people who are successful, that is they perceive failure as feedback and use it to spur them to greater heights. To make it sound simpler, they use this feedback to change their strategy and take action once again. This process is repeated over and over again until they get what they want.

Thus i was wondering why is it that so few people are willing to keep changing and take action until they succeed? Worst still why are there people who give up halfway through the battle? I take myself as a living example and came to this conclusion - commitment. Although everyone, baring those who need to tighten their screws up there would desire to succeed but in truth, only afew are COMMITTED to their goals.

I remember once i set myself so many goals, but ended up failing to fufil a single of them and giving up halfway often. I pondered through everything can realized this: when a goal is nothing more than a feeble desire or a wish, i will find myself being held backk by setbacks, frustration and failures. The same thing goes if my goals are nothing more than desires, i will probably do only everything that is within the COMFORT ZONE and beyond that i will find myself giving all sorts of fucking excuses not for not doing it. As a result i will never do whatever it takes to get what i want.

When a goal becomes a MUST.....we operate from a different mind-set. This is also as good as saying when we give ourselves no options and no way out but to succeed, we will always find a way.

It's really amazing what we can achieve in our short lives if our goal became a MUST. Take losing weight for example. Most people set a goal to lose weight through dieting and exercising or whatever pills they can get their hands on. They get very excited by they thought of having a slim nice figure and get motivated for a couple of days or weeks but pretty soon they give up and fail to get any results. The excuses will start flowing out.

But what if someone were to point a gun to the head of a loved one and threathen to kill that person unless u lose 5kg in a reasonable period of time, do u think u would be able to achieve it?

I guess this is a very good example of 'MUST'. When something becomes a MUST, it taps into our unlimited personal resources and this enables us to achieve virtually anything! Of course the 'anything' has to make sense as well and not some ridiculous or impossible things.

I've finally learned to fufil my goals, turning them into reality instead of pure dreams and desires. Well perhaps this is also the reason behind my life turning more meaningful - slowly but surely!



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posted by mango at 8:22 PM 0 Bitchings
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
Shopping Wishes

I wished Singapore and its shopping scene is bigger, the guys' stuffs to be exact. 3 days of shopping makes me realize how small Singapore is and how little guys' stuffs are there in the shops. Everywhere i went, its all girls stuff and i guess i must have passed by at least 5 or 6 girls shop before i saw a guy's shop.

And to confound matters, most shops i went into i did not find anything i fancy. Yes there are some i fancy really much but the price makes me sick, $299 for a pair of jeans and $189 for shirt from Armani. I could i have bought them but i kept to my resolution of saving money this year so i gave those 3 figure stuffs a miss.

Why huh, why is it that shopping is made easy for girls but not for guys?! Why can't there be more shops selling guys stuffs? And i mean quality and reasonably priced shops like Topman and French Connection, not those cheapo fake-brand stuffs at bugis street.

3 Days of shopping for cny clothes and i only bought 3 pathetic stuffs, a shirt from Domachi, a jeans from Topman and a t-shirt from fcuk. Damn i told myself not to splurge on t-shirts but my hands got itchy i guess. I'm still short of at least 1 set more plus shoes and belt and i haven't a bloody clue where to get them!

Freaking tired, update more after another round of shopping on Thursday. Lights out, its 11.30pm and i have a fucking 9am class tomorrow!
posted by mango at 11:17 PM 0 Bitchings
Sunday, January 22, 2006
Spring Cleaning

Excatly 7 days from today would be chinese new year and it has always been a habit for my family to have some spring cleaning afew days before cny. I'm proud to say i've been cleaning my own room since 16 or 17 onwards and its no mean feat especially for a lazy guy haha.

Sensing that the coming week would be busy i started cleaning today at 11.30am and only ended at....5pm!! Whoa the longest cleaning i ever did in my life man, no doubts! I'm totally dead beat after cleaning every single corner of my room, ceiling, wardrobe, desk, cabinets, bed area, drawers, windows, etc. Needless to say most parts are dusty like hell which left me sneezing non stop and it doesnt helps that i din't have a mask to cover my poor nose.



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My desk is a total mess

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In the process of cleaning...

While cleaning, i stumble upon some 'antiques'. True to being a cancer i'm used to keeping things for memories.

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I remember being over the moon at the sight of this gift from my ex joyce in 1998. She gave me a bottle containing lots of sweets because she's sweet and love is supposed to be sweet!

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Can anyone remember these 'priceless' hello kitty that left spore in chaos?!

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Special limited edition chocolate flavour condoms. Hey it really tastes like chocolate, so real that i nearly eat it!

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wow i din't know this is still around, 7th month gift from Claris in 2000.

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My 1st and 2nd bottle of perfume in 1995.

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This is why im a pretty good drinker! Alcohol training at home! juz kidding!

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My collection of perfumes

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These were like 'diamonds' when i was a kid in primary school. One golden card can sell for $5 which is a lot for a 10 year old kid in 1994 ok!

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The area under my bed....GOSH!

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My entire wardrobe, i ended up dumping 1/4 of these clothes

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House-clothes and shorts

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Finally!


I really love it when i finish cleaning it. The dust-free atmosphere smells and feels extremely refreshing especially with the air-con switched on! All's not done though, i still have to mop the floor and settle those old jeans which i plan to do another day, too exhausted man and i still have to get some sleep before waking up at 11 to catch the biggest game of the season Man Utd vs Liverpool!

Had a hair cut and color on friday. Honestly i think this style looks good on me, not too short and not too long but most importantly not messy! The brown beige color isn't that visible but i love it, suddenly i don't like having a head that's so bright and 'outstanding' anymore!
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posted by mango at 6:28 PM 0 Bitchings
Monday, January 16, 2006
Getting life busier

I've no doubts how awful i did for my system security common test so i was mentally prepared when i received my paper back this morning. Grade F. Expected. I think i scored around 10 out of 50 and this accounts for 20% of my overall marks for this modules damn.

I'm disappointed as i did make an effort to study hard for that paper especially certain topics but god knows what got into me that day when i flipped over the question paper. What was deem as easy meat became mission impossible. The questions seemed like demons staring at me waiting to eat me up.

Mrs Leo asked me what happened and i was struggling for an answer as well before eventually telling her i got a total blackout that day. Luckily she was encouraging and told me to buck up and i will make it. For Christ's sake i really have to score very well for the next lab test (20%) and exam (40%) to have any hopes of passing. Well i know i can do it but i just don't like placing myself in this kind of siutation where i have to depend on my final exams to pass. It willl be extremely stressful and nerve jangling when i prepare for my final exams.

I'm going to work extra hard starting from today where i'm going to redo the whole paper myself and read up certain topics. The busier i keep myself the happier i seem to be and life seemed more colourful.

This is my new lifestyle, one which i've never experienced before and certainly one i'm enjoying.
posted by mango at 1:29 PM 0 Bitchings
Sunday, January 15, 2006
Boring weekend

A painstakingly weekend with next to nothing to write or rave about unless i decided to write a full detailed entry about what i did at home for this weekend. Oh yeah i finally watched a movie in like 2 months on Friday with an old pal - In Her Shoes. Quite a nice show but i admit at times my eyes were only fixed onto Cameron Diaz and i think most of the guys in the theatre will agree with me why. Funnily enough it was my 1st time watching a movie at bugis junction's shaw cineplex and the whole theatre was extremely dark, big and cold. There was no lights to guide people to their seats so we randomly find a seat to sit. In fact it was so dark that i would recommend that anyone intending to catch a horror flick should choose this cineplex.

Started using the new 'limited edition' Microsoft windows live msn 8.0 today thanks to Shank and found it really cool. What was surprising however was the moment i signed into it, all the previously deleted contacts were in my list. Got quite a shock at how many people i've actually deleted or blocked over the years. I know the picture isn't very clear as i rezied it but try to bear with it alright. Here's afew minimized screenshots of it msn 8.0 live.

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I find the new feature whereby we could send messages to people who are offline specially useful and cool. It will just be like sending sms through computers or msn.

Realized that i have so many people on my list that when i tried scrolling down it lags. So for once i decided to be hardworking and went through every nicks to see if can delete anyone. I ended up deleting over 20 people, non-talking or seemily non-existent people to be exact. I don't see the point in having so many people on my list and yet some are like totally don't talk or never even talked before. I'm happier with the way my list looks now, even though my list still have a total of 109 peeps. Will slowly delete even more people, without notice that is. Lesson learnt, no more 'wild' adding of people into my list.

Today is sunday which means 2 weeks from now it's gonna be chinese new year, which also meant that the upcoming 2 week is gonna be very busy in terms of school, driving lessons, and new year preparations, etc. I welcome it though for i find that keeping myself busy is really good sometimes. Suddenly i love being busy and having lots of things to accomplish and do everyday instead of slacking and having fun all the time.

Suddenly there are no more sleeping during the wee mornings like 3 or 4am, provided unless there is a Liverpool match on TV during midnight. I find myself sleeping as early as 9pm sometimes but most of the time i'm asleep by 12am and up by 9am the next day. I'm enjoying the change and hopefully it'd do me some good as well.
posted by mango at 1:50 PM 0 Bitchings
Thursday, January 12, 2006
Shall we Dance

Tiredness and illness got the better of me yesterday so i only managed to blog today. I was rather early in school yesterday morning and nobody was in school yet so i kill time away at the library watching dvd. I had a hard time choosing between 2 old shows, 'Signs' and 'Shall we dance'. I choosed the latter and what a show it turns out to be, not only it was nice and humourous but more importantly it rekindle an old ambition of mine - dance.

Speaking further of the show, despite being an old show dated back to late 2004 it was inspiring and humourous. The dance movements were eye-catching as well not to mention J'Lopez in those skin tight dance outfits! There was this particular ridiculous and yet humourous conversation that made me laugh and wonder at the same time.

Chic: I'm here for the ladies, you know what they say about guys that can dance...
Bobbie: Yeah, that they're great in bed.
Chic: Right.
Bobbie: Where do you hear this crap?
Chic: Everywhere, everywhere the guys that can dance get the pick of the litter.


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Richard Gere joining the dance school was making people laugh their asses off considering his age but he went a long way to show that age is nothing provided one has the determination and passion.

Anyway i still find this extremely touching and inspiring :

"We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet... I mean, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things... all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness'."

I had lots of ambitions when i was young and one of my first ambitions were to be a footballer, a dancer or an artist - in this order. Naturally and needless to say my parents were typical like the majority of Singaporean parents, wanting me to become a doctor or a lawyer, well those kind of decent and good paying jobs u know? I had other ideas though, i still regret not making it as a footballer when i was young, it was something i had alot of passion for and u know what they say about jobs? U find a job that u love and u would simply not get sick or tired of going to work everyday or even the thoughts of it.

Next comes dancing, the thought of taking up dancing as a hobby or profession crossed my mind several times in the past but that was like almost 9 or 10 years ago. I love a type of dance where i can express myself freely, dancing to my body's moods or rhythm. Its called Tango, although another dance known as 'Rumba' come close as well. I always felt dancing would allow me to freely express myself, dancing like nobody's watching its extremely releaxing. The only reason why i din't follow up my ambition was i din't have time as studies was extremely important back then. Plus i din't know where to get more information of Tango dance courses as well and things like that.

Tango is also known as the dance of love, originated in Argentina. A Tango dancer must develop a strong connection with the music, the dance and the audience . The audience can only feel this connection if the dancer himself/herself feels and projects this feeling. Another dance i love is Waltz which i find simply elegant, like dancing on clouds without a worry in this world.



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Who knows in future i might just take up a dance course or something just for leisure. Ballroom dancing is simply different from dancing in discos or clubs. In those places people simply let their hair down to relax and dance to whatever they wish but ballroom dancing requires more passion and feelings. Its intimating and sensual at times as well. Some dance to entertain, some to show off, and others to fill their rice bowls but for me i dance to feelings and passion.

I feel like living in some winter countries even though i've never even visited one before. The weather these days is making me go bonkers, i can wake up in the middle of the night coughing and shivering with cold. Missed school today as a result of oversleeping and feeling ill. Can it snow instead of rain? Damn!


posted by mango at 2:30 PM 0 Bitchings
Tuesday, January 10, 2006
Terribly Sick

It seem to be almost 2 years since i last had a fever and i can't recall a time i was so sick as well. Feverish, resulting in my whole body shivering cold, a non-stop flu every 10 seconds or so, a throat so sore i lost my voice, and a cough that results in phlegm being 'thrown out'. 5 hit combo man, my whole body is totally numb and weak.

I guess my whole body couldn't adjust to the sudden change in weather, from hot to sudden rain all day long. Plus the Malaysian cigarettes seem to make matters worse, now that is one reason why i hate smoking malaysian cigarettes, the Menthol Lights there tastes like Menthol, so thick and gives me sore throats. I've so much things i wanna do yet i'm sick at this time, how bad the timing is but looking ahead i guess its not so bad afterall, for i din't fall sick during chinese new year and i'm thankful for that. I could do nothing at all whole day except for resting and ocassionally playing online games and reading blogs just to kill time and make myself sleepy.

It feels terrible to be sick, can't even lie down properly on the bed. Without blanket i feel so cold that i could shiver, yet with it i feel so hot inside. Everything i ate seem to be tasteless, and i seem to be eating more medicine than food. I choosed not to see a doctor as i still had some old medicine left from previous similiar illness, din't feel the need to waste money not that i'm stubborn.

There's an assignment demo tomorrow morning and i'm praying i'd be well awake and fine by then. I wanna score A for that assignment seeing JOey and Kylie getting A+ haha but i doubt its possible, maybe B+ i'd be happy cause i really hate demos and presentations argh!

Picture of the day, have a laugh. This ball must be filled with tones of weight inside to have such an impact lol

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posted by mango at 5:56 PM 0 Bitchings
Monday, January 09, 2006
Idiotic Instructor

Right from the moment i saw him, his face was fucking black like someone owed him a million dollars. Keeping that in mind i tried being nice and friendly and willing to listen to whatever he says.

But god knows what stepped on his tail every little mistake i made was greeted with fucking comments like "wah lao eh not liketat lah!"......"dun blur blur la look properly can or not".....and not to mention the fucking black and 'buay song' face he gave me. The old Floyd would have shown him the middle finger I swear! I kept my temper, kept telling myself to relax even though its hard with heavy traffic everywhere and i was sick with flu and a slight fever. For christ's sake the role of an instructor or teacher is to TEACH with PATIENCE and not hurl abuse at students or call them stupid! KNN! I admit i 'lost it' totally at one point, i sped past the traffic junction and told him to shut up! Not everyone takes such a short time to learn things alright, some people just take longer and requires more patience and i'm one of them i made it clear. He gave remained silent and refuse to look at me. Fuck what kind of attitude is this?! I feel like punching him, in fact i'm very sure i would have done it if it was in the past.

Bad mood? None of my business! I paid the fees and i have the right to get a proper lesson. I'm going to post the feedback of this idiot LIM LEE!!

FUCK OFF MAN!!
posted by mango at 6:41 PM 0 Bitchings
Saturday, January 07, 2006
Girls don't like boys, girls like cars and money

"Don't worry about girls, if u have a good job and lots of money u will be able to find a wife".

This was the exact line that i vividly recall my mom saying to me countless times when i'm still a kid growing up. I think nothing of it for years that rolled by until recently. Mom's words are always true and for your own good afterall right?

Then of course not all girls are like that, i know, we know, so before u ram your mouth off please read properly alright!

To be realistic, we're living in the modern times so long gone are those 'oh so sweet' girls who don't mind suffering hardship for the sake of love. Those can still be found in movies and dramas though. Girls today seek fame, wealth and luxury over guys. While i hold my hands up and admit having all the riches in the world would means the rice bowl is secured and one would be able to live a luxury life, i doubt it is right to stay with a guy, choose a guy or even want a guy purely because of his money. Isn't that as good as cheating him and making use of him?

I still don't understand, are credit cards, cash, cars, and those membership cards to whatever clubs so important?

Money rules the world, money buys us luxury and nearly everything we want but it is just not right to be obsessed with it. Having a car is convenient and a bonus of course but its not right to deem it as a MUST HAVE. I'm under no such siutations, its just my frank opinions. =)

I really can't help feeling mother fucking sick when people boast about whatever shit they are capable of.

"My bf drive EVO 9 leh"
"No need queue one la...we got membership...vip u know"
"ytd we open 2 martels, 1 chivas...bla bla"


I don't feel the need to expand the above list of perfect examples of sickening boastings that've entered my ears. I love it when people are made to eat their words when i proved them absolutely WRONG! I love the looks on their faces when they know what a fool they've made of themselves. Its like seeing your enemy being forced to eat humble pie.

My time will undoubtedly come. Thanks to certain people, i've something to inspire me to greater heights. I realized i'm like this, only when there's something or someone whom i'm really determined to prove wrong will i be able to motivate myself alot. I'm not saying i can't motivate myself i'm saying when there's something that motivates me and drives me on the hunger and anger inside will only led me to greater things.

I'm not going to type a fucking list of things i'm going to do or acheive. All i would say and promise is i will make heads turn. That time will come, not a tiny doubt about it.
posted by mango at 6:21 PM 0 Bitchings
Wednesday, January 04, 2006
I'm just standing outside your door...

It seem like ages since i last stepped into familiar surroundings - school. I guess the 2 weeks festive holiday mood still hasn't left my mind yet. I felt wierd when i stepped into school today, even wierd when i entered the classroom and seeing all the familiar faces. The mood wasn't there, i kept going out of the class to smoke or the toilet to waste time. Finally studied all the important topics for tomorrow's test as well, much as i hate to. I feel good, i know i'm not going to fail the paper now.

I've been having a hard time getting to sleep the past 3 nights. Every night there are so many things going in and out of my mind. Each night i'd dig up the oldest CDs containing all the sad love songs, some as old as 1996, turn off the lights, lit a cig and look out of my window to the skies. Finish the cig and it takes me like hours to actually fall asleep. I din't want to toture myself with panadols so i kept tossing around instead. My appetite these few days are huge, i seem to indulge myself in anything i can lay my hands on. I could even finish up 3 cans of tuna at one go, and thats frightening to many i guess.

i don't wanna hear no more
i don't wanna know no more
an ordinary tree amongst others
tell me if i'm wasting my time
tell me if i'm simply just dirt to u
i'm strong enough to take the blow
i'm just in front of your door
decide if u wanna open it
posted by mango at 12:34 AM 0 Bitchings
Sunday, January 01, 2006
Hello 2006!

Boom!! The first sight of fireworks were spotted, the crowd went wild with all sorts of noises and screams. My last wish for 2005 had came true. I clasp my palms together and made a wish for 2006. I'm not going to reveal what wish i made though.

Thanks to the rain the early part of the plan had to be changed. I scrambled around plaza singapura looking for 2 kind souls willing to buy the pair of tickets to "A chinese tall story" i had booked. Pior to that i asked all my friends if any of them were in town but to no avail. Thankfully enough i spotted a couple about to purchase some tickets.

Me: err hi may i know what time slot are u watching? Is it the 4.35pm show?
*Both look at me cautiously and wierdly*
The BF: No, its the 7pm one, why?
Me: oh i had a last min change of plans and have a pair of unwated tickets to the exact show u'r watching. I'm thinking of giving them to u would u be interested? Its a 4.35pm show.
*I duno why i say give, i'm too generous lol*
The GF: hmmm which seats did u book? Is it the front or the back?
Me: Its the 2nd last row from the back and in the middle. Good view!
*The couple looked at each other seemily to decide*
The BF: ok lah i'd have it....its 4.35pm right?
Me: Yeap! Thanks man!
*At that moment the bf gave me $18 bucks*
Me: huh no need lah, its okiee don't wanna waste the tickets u don't have to pay me.
The GF: no, its okiee just take it.
Me: errmm thanks alot!
*I felt extremely relieved even though the tickets i book costs $20 i'm grateful enough with $18*

Bless the couple who bought the tickets god!


The rain still wouldn't stop pouring meaning she can't come out. I went to some bookstores and killed nearly 2 hours there, grabbing all sorts of magazines and books and settled down in a 'cosy' corner of the kids' section and read away. I love the kids' section as i wouldn't get so much stares from strangers and its less noisy there as well. Throughout the time i spent there my stomach was crying out, for food of course.

Eventually the damn rain stopped pouring and i went to meet her at the station near her place. Spent another 1 hour or so waiting there and at one point i was thinking: "is she going to meet me afterall"? I din't wanted to call and ask, as it would be annoying if i'm preparing and someone were to keep calling and asking if i'm done or not. I just sent and sms and waited patiently but deep inside i'm praying nothing disastrous is going to happen. Not today at least. Finally i spotted her and what a relief it was i have to say. Patience pays off afterall.

We had dinner at Lotus Grill Restaurent at Clarke Quay. The restaurent's on a beautiful boat but initially as seats for two were full, we were given a kinda dim and bad table. Luckily we changed to a good, breezy and bright table after someone left. The food's okie but i should have ordered lobsters if i knew they tastes so good there, lobster salad especially!


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Appetizers - lobster salad and vietnamese spring rolls.

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i regret not ordering that salad!

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Part of the boat restaurent

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She's full i'm not, can u tell from our facial reaction?

Hang around at Clarke Quay for awhile and actually i wanted to try the g-max, that is the ultra high amusement park stuff but the price ($35) isn't worth it. Not when i'm only being 'swinged' for less than 2 minutes, not exciting and no kick!


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g-max ready to shoot up into the sky

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there it goes....

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a street performer

New year eve 2005 was also the first time in a long time, say 4 or 5 years that i did not countdown at any pubs or discos. Instead i found myself watching fireworks at marina square. The newly renovated marina square is quite impressive and one part of the mall resembles far east or heeren shops, especially the stuffs they sell there. It was abit wierd suddenly, sitting with these aunties and uncles with their kids or grandchilds waiting for fireworks to light up the sky and for 2006 to arrive. She was taking so much pictures of herself while waiting for the fireworks that i can't help but admire every bit of it. That sweet smile, those big eyes and the way she snap pictures. I relish every moment there, at times i wished the clock would stop, and if i could choose again i would choose to end and start a year at the same place with the same person.


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part of the crowd at marina

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we're too bored but its not easy snapping this picture!

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i find this specially sweet and cute

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monster and bear

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Went to meet Sze Wei after sending her home as he was alone. We went to MOS to chill and slack till dawn before heading home. By the time i was there its already 2.30 and not so packed but still have to queue awhile damn! While waiting for him at the banks of singapore river at Clarke Quay, i found myself staring blindly into my camera and smiling like an idiot at the images taken in the last few hours of 2005. I swear i was looking at the pictures with so much interest and joy that if someone were to give me a slight shove i'd end up tumbling into the river!


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this is actually a swing in mos

2005 ended beautifully for me because of her although i know its not the case for her. Nevertheless i'm grateful enough and its a memory i'd cherish.



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I got this from someone's blog........

"Seize every opportunity you have to tell your loved one how much they mean to you. Though the mushy words tends to give you goose bumps, but at the same time they are the most sincere ones..."

......and i wish to add my own opinions as well. Though it makes sense, ever thought of whether your words might bring u joy or pain? If the answer's already so clear would those words of revelation make a difference? Maybe. More likely though, its gonna bring pain and suffering. Words are essential but cheap at most of the time. Given a choice would u rather tell that person how much he/she means to u when u already know the answer or would u rather save your words and save your heart from those hurtful reactions/answers? I don't know which i would choose honestly but i do know that i expect nothing in return for everything i give.

Today's a brand new day, 1 Jan 2006 and that means tomorrow right up to Friday is going to be a hectic and stressful week thanks to common tests. 2 weeks holiday vacation ended so fast and i haven't even started revising any shit. I fucking hate (ok it should be envious) of those peeps who have NO PAPERS! How shiok man! I'm going to have to get started revising starting from tomorrow onwards and after this week it'd be shopping time in preparation for Chinese New Year!

**u know who u're, hope u like the gift even though its not a big deal. its tough finding a nice design that is size 10 u know =p
posted by mango at 6:19 PM 0 Bitchings


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